{"id":525,"date":"2013-09-16T18:11:36","date_gmt":"2013-09-16T18:11:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/harpa.blogg.is\/2013-09-16\/thunglyndid\/"},"modified":"2013-11-19T09:38:08","modified_gmt":"2013-11-19T09:38:08","slug":"thunglyndid","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/2013\/09\/16\/thunglyndid\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00deunglyndi\u00f0"},"content":{"rendered":"

vir\u00f0ist ekkert \u00ed r\u00e9num. \u00dev\u00ed mi\u00f0ur. \u00c9g er enn \u00f3l\u00e6s, stoppa\u00f0i \u00ed mi\u00f0ju kafi \u00ed spennandi gl\u00e6pas\u00f6gu og er f\u00f6st \u00ed byrjuninni \u00e1 \u00cdslenskir k\u00f3ngar<\/em>, b\u00f3k sem m\u00e9r finnst mj\u00f6g skemmtileg. \u00dea\u00f0 er f\u00falt a\u00f0 vera \u00f3l\u00e6s b\u00f3kmenntafr\u00e6\u00f0ingur og \u00f3l\u00e6s “kona sem liggur alltaf\u00a0\u00ed b\u00f3kum” en \u00ed augnablikinu er ekkert vi\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 gera. \u00deetta l\u00fdsir s\u00e9r \u00feannig a\u00f0 \u00e9g les nokkrar s\u00ed\u00f0ur og velti \u00fev\u00ed svo fyrir m\u00e9r hva\u00f0 \u00ed \u00f3sk\u00f6punum \u00e9g hafi veri\u00f0 a\u00f0 lesa e\u00f0a hver \u00feessi pers\u00f3na sem allt \u00ed einu d\u00fakkar upp er eiginlega, kann allt eins a\u00f0 vera a\u00f0alpers\u00f3na sem \u00e9g veit ekki lengur nein deili \u00e1. Og hva\u00f0 gera \u00f3l\u00e6sar konur? Tja … \u00e9g leysi \u00feetta me\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 f\u00e1 l\u00e1na\u00f0ar “sko\u00f0ib\u00e6kur” \u00e1 b\u00f3kasafninu, b\u00e6kur sem ma\u00f0ur flettir en les ekki fr\u00e1 or\u00f0i til or\u00f0s. \u00c6xla\u00f0i m\u00e9r \u00cdslenska silfursm\u00ed\u00f0i<\/em> og Gar\u00f0yrkjuriti\u00f0<\/em> og slatta af prj\u00f3nab\u00f3kum\/bl\u00f6\u00f0um n\u00fana \u00e1\u00f0an. Svo m\u00e1 g\u00e1 hvort \u00e9g n\u00e6 svona \u00feremur-fj\u00f3rum bla\u00f0s\u00ed\u00f0um af \u00cdslenskum k\u00f3ngum<\/em> … kannski ef \u00e9g hlusta \u00e1 t\u00f3nlist og syng me\u00f0, \u00e1 me\u00f0an …<\/p>\n

Anna\u00f0 sem truflar mig \u00feessa dagana er almenn heila\u00feoka. \u00deetta hugtak, heila\u00feoka, er vel\u00feekkt \u00ed vefjagigtarfr\u00e6\u00f0um og Sj\u00f6grens-heilkennisfr\u00e6\u00f0um og \u00e1byggilega v\u00ed\u00f0ar en hins vegar l\u00edti\u00f0 br\u00faka\u00f0 \u00ed ge\u00f0l\u00e6kningafr\u00e6\u00f0um. Aftur \u00e1 m\u00f3ti hugsa \u00e9g a\u00f0 allir \u00feunglyndissj\u00faklingar \u00feekki fyrirb\u00e6ri\u00f0 \u00e1g\u00e6tlega af eigin raun. Fyrir utan almennan athyglisbrest mism\u00e6li \u00e9g mig alla vega \u00ed kross (sag\u00f0i t.d. \u00ferisvar sinnum “vettlingar” og meinti “trefill” n\u00fana \u00ed morgun) og man ekki or\u00f0, svo ekki s\u00e9 n\u00fa minnst \u00e1 n\u00f6fn.<\/p>\n

\u00cd fyrstu skiptin sem heila\u00feokan lag\u00f0ist yfir mig, segjum fyrstu tuttugu skiptin, snarbr\u00e1 m\u00e9r og \u00e9g f\u00f3r \u00e6vinlega a\u00f0 velta fyrir m\u00e9r hvort \u00e9g v\u00e6ri komin me\u00f0 Alzheimer e\u00f0a einhvern annan heilahr\u00f6rnunarsj\u00fakd\u00f3m. En svo l\u00e6rir \u00feunglyndissj\u00faklingur eins og \u00e9g a\u00f0 \u00feetta gengur \u00e6vinlega til baka, milli kasta. Ma\u00f0ur ver\u00f0ur bara a\u00f0 s\u00e6tta sig vi\u00f0 \u00feetta me\u00f0an \u00fea\u00f0 varir – sem er \u00e1kaflega erfitt fyrir fullkomnunarsinna eins og mig. Versta tilviki\u00f0 var 2010, \u00fe\u00e1 lenti \u00e9g \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 hafa steingleymt hvernig fitja\u00f0 er upp! N\u00fa fitjar ma\u00f0ur \u00f3sj\u00e1lfr\u00e1tt upp og sp\u00e1ir ekki miki\u00f0 \u00ed hvernig \u00fea\u00f0 er gert, alveg eins og \u00feeir sem hlaupa, synda o.s.fr. eru ekki a\u00f0 velta \u00fev\u00ed fyrir s\u00e9r hvernig skref er teki\u00f0 e\u00f0a n\u00e1kv\u00e6mlega hvernig bringusundsf\u00f3tatak er framkv\u00e6mt. \u00deegar \u00e9g sat me\u00f0 garni\u00f0 og prj\u00f3nana og uppg\u00f6tva\u00f0i a\u00f0 \u00e9g kunni ekki lengur a\u00f0 fitja upp, \u00fearna um \u00e1ri\u00f0, f\u00e9llust m\u00e9r gersamlega hendur (og \u00fea\u00f0 einnig \u00ed b\u00f3kstaflegri merkingu, eins og gefur a\u00f0 skilja). R\u00e1\u00f0i\u00f0? Ja, \u00e9g f\u00f3r \u00fat a\u00f0 reykja og pr\u00f3fa\u00f0i aftur, svona t\u00edu m\u00edn\u00fatum s\u00ed\u00f0ar … \u00fe\u00e1 kunni \u00e9g aftur a\u00f0 fitja upp \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n

Dagarnir eru svol\u00edti\u00f0 misjafnir \u00fev\u00ed inn \u00e1 milli koma dagar \u00fear sem m\u00e9r finnst \u00e9g hafa h\u00e1an hita og finn miki\u00f0 fyrir jafnv\u00e6gistruflunum og er fl\u00f6kurt. \u00c1 m\u00f3ti kemur a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e1 daga er \u00e9g \u00fe\u00e6gilega slj\u00f3 og sl\u00e9tt sama um allt, \u00fe.\u00e1.m. eigin l\u00ed\u00f0an. A\u00f0ra daga er \u00e9g betri tengslum vi\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfa mig og umhverfi\u00f0.<\/p>\n

A\u00f0alatri\u00f0i\u00f0 er, finnst m\u00e9r, a\u00f0 nota “Fake it till you make it”, vel\u00feekktan frasa \u00far alkageiranum. Svolei\u00f0is a\u00f0 \u00e1 hverjum morgni kem \u00e9g m\u00e9r \u00e1 lappir \u00e1 skikkanlegum t\u00edma, fer \u00ed sturtu og hrein f\u00f6t og reyni svona svol\u00edti\u00f0 a\u00f0 l\u00edta \u00fat eins og “snyrtileg kona \u00e1 sextugsaldri” erkit\u00fdpan \u00e1 a\u00f0 l\u00fakka. (\u00deetta er s\u00f6mulei\u00f0is afbrig\u00f0i af “clean and sober” alkal\u00f6gm\u00e1linu …) Og klikka ekki \u00e1 a\u00f0 m\u00e6ta \u00ed vinnuna, \u00feetta hlutastarf sem \u00e9g sinni. Enda \u00feori \u00e9g alls ekki a\u00f0 sleppa \u00fev\u00ed, \u00fea\u00f0 g\u00e6ti\u00a0allt eins veri\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00e9g k\u00e6mist \u00fe\u00e1 ekki til vinnu fyrr en eftir margar vikur. Hanga \u00ed helv. r\u00fat\u00ednunni, \u00fea\u00f0 er m\u00e1li\u00f0! Og fyrirgefa s\u00e9r \u00e1 hverjum degi a\u00f0 vera ekki fullkomin og\u00a0mega segja \u00feess vegna \u00ferisvar sinnum vettlingar \u00ed sta\u00f0inn fyrir trefill \u00ed eigin prj\u00f3nakennslustund, eins og hver annar auli.<\/p>\n

Sem betur fer sn\u00fdr mitt \u00feunglyndi \u00feannig a\u00f0 m\u00e9r l\u00ed\u00f0ur sk\u00e1st \u00e1 morgnana en verst seinnipartinn og \u00e1 kv\u00f6ldin. \u00dea\u00f0 er heppilegt mi\u00f0a\u00f0 vi\u00f0 r\u00fat\u00ednu allra hinna, hinna heilbrig\u00f0u. \u00c1 kv\u00f6ldin m\u00e1 hanga yfir sj\u00f3nvarpinu, \u00e9g get fylgst me\u00f0 sj\u00f3nvarpi ef \u00e9g prj\u00f3na \u00e1 me\u00f0an (trix sem athyglisbrostnir hafa fatta\u00f0 fyrir \u00f3ral\u00f6ngu en \u00e9g efast um a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 s\u00e9 vi\u00f0urkennt \u00ed ge\u00f0l\u00e6knisfr\u00e6\u00f0um). Ef sj\u00f3nvarpsgl\u00e1p er m\u00e9r um megn spila \u00e9g \u00f3merkilegan t\u00f6lvuleik, Bubble Town. (\u00c9g n\u00e6 ekki nokkru sambandi vi\u00f0 Candy Crush, sem allar hinar “snyrtilegu konurnar \u00e1 sextugsaldri” spila \u00feessa dagana, m\u00e9r finnst hann lei\u00f0inlegur.) \u00c9g gladdist mj\u00f6g \u00feegar \u00e9g las grein eftir \u00feunglyndis-og kv\u00ed\u00f0asj\u00fakling \u00ed einhverjum netmi\u00f0linum fyrir sk\u00f6mmu, \u00fear sem h\u00fan sag\u00f0i fr\u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 h\u00fan spila\u00f0i Bejewelled ef h\u00fan v\u00e6ri miki\u00f0 veik. Einstaka sinnum spila \u00e9g nefnilega Bejewelled undir s\u00f6mu kringumst\u00e6\u00f0um, oftar \u00fe\u00f3 Atomica e\u00f0a Bubble Town en \u00fea\u00f0 skiptir ekki m\u00e1li: Fyrir mig var mikilv\u00e6gt og fr\u00e1b\u00e6rt a\u00f0 vita af \u00f6\u00f0rum sem nota s\u00f6mu a\u00f0fer\u00f0, \u00f3merkilega “ra\u00f0a \u00feremur saman” t\u00f6lvuleiki til a\u00f0 klj\u00e1st vi\u00f0 \u00feunglyndi.<\/p>\n

Svona tekur ma\u00f0ur einn dag \u00ed einu \u00feanga\u00f0 til kasti\u00f0 r\u00e9nar … sem \u00fea\u00f0 gerir alltaf \u00e1 endanum. Og \u00fea\u00f0 er mikill l\u00e9ttir og st\u00f3r pl\u00fas a\u00f0 \u00feurfa ekki a\u00f0 gl\u00edma vi\u00f0 aukaverkanir ge\u00f0lyfja \u00e1 sama t\u00edma, \u00fea\u00f0 er eiginlega bara fyrir fullfr\u00edskt f\u00f3lk a\u00f0 \u00e9ta svolei\u00f0is! \u00deessar 20+ lyfjategundir sem \u00e9g hef gadda\u00f0 \u00ed mig\u00a0\u00e1 m\u00ednum sj\u00fakd\u00f3msferli hafa ekki haft\u00a0neitt a\u00f0 segja til b\u00f3ta sj\u00fakd\u00f3mnum\u00a0en \u00e1 hinn b\u00f3ginn haft helling af\u00a0neikv\u00e6\u00f0um verkunum \u00ed f\u00f6r me\u00f0 s\u00e9r.\u00a0N\u00fa eru r\u00famar tv\u00e6r vikur s\u00ed\u00f0an \u00e9g steig s\u00ed\u00f0ustu tr\u00f6ppuna \u00ed ni\u00f0urtr\u00f6ppun \u00feunglyndislyfsins M\u00edron, t\u00f3k \u00fat s\u00ed\u00f0asta t\u00edundapartinn af dagskammti. Enda\u00a0hrekk \u00e9g upp \u00e1 hverri n\u00f3ttu og f\u00e6 k\u00f6lduhroll nokkrum sinnum \u00e1 dag,\u00a0en veit, af \u00fev\u00ed \u00e9g hef skrifa\u00f0 ni\u00f0ur hj\u00e1 m\u00e9r helstu einkenni ni\u00f0urtr\u00f6ppunar s\u00ed\u00f0an \u00e9g byrja\u00f0i a\u00f0 trappa\u00a0lyfi\u00f0 ni\u00f0ur \u00ed mars, a\u00f0 \u00feessi einkenni\u00a0hverfa eftir \u00ferj\u00e1r\u00a0vikur\u00a0\u00e1\u00a0tr\u00f6ppunni. Sem n\u00e1lgast \u00f3\u00f0fluga. \u00a0Sem betur fer, \u00feannig s\u00e9\u00f0, byrja\u00f0i \u00feetta \u00feunglyndiskast \u00e1\u00f0ur en \u00e9g steig s\u00ed\u00f0ustu tr\u00f6ppuna og sem betur fer, \u00feannig s\u00e9\u00f0, f\u00e9kk \u00e9g sl\u00e6mt kast \u00ed desember sem st\u00f3\u00f0 svo \u00ed marga m\u00e1nu\u00f0i, verandi \u00fe\u00f3 \u00fe\u00e1 \u00e1 r\u00e1\u00f0l\u00f6g\u00f0um dagskammti af \u00feessu \u00feunglyndislyfi … svo \u00e9g \u00fearf ekkert a\u00f0 \u00edmynda m\u00e9r a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 a\u00f0 vera \u00e1 e\u00f0a h\u00e6tta \u00e1 \u00feessu lyfi hafi haft nokkurn skapa\u00f0an hlut a\u00f0 segja\u00a0\u00ed \u00feunglyndinu. Kl\u00edn\u00edsk reynsla m\u00edn af m\u00e9r segir \u00fea\u00f0 \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n

J\u00e6ja: \u00cd dag n\u00e1\u00f0i \u00e9g a\u00f0 l\u00edta \u00fat eins og erkit\u00fdpa snyrtilegu-konunnar-\u00e1-sextugsaldri, m\u00e6ta \u00ed vinnuna, lj\u00f3srita helling (d\u00e1samleg i\u00f0ja fyrir \u00fe\u00e1 sem b\u00faa \u00ed heila\u00feoku) og \u00fatb\u00faa \u00feannig kennsluefni,\u00a0fara \u00e1 b\u00f3kasafni\u00f0, ond\u00falera kettina, \u00fevo nokkrar \u00fevottav\u00e9lar, blogga … Sem er flottur \u00e1rangur mi\u00f0a\u00f0 vi\u00f0 heilsuna. Sk\u00edtt me\u00f0 \u00fe\u00f3tt \u00e9g hafi ekki n\u00e1\u00f0 a\u00f0 lesa neitt, treysti m\u00e9r\u00a0ekki til a\u00f0 prj\u00f3na munstur\u00a0(og \u00fe.a.l. liggja\u00a0nokkur h\u00e1lfkl\u00e1ru\u00f0 prj\u00f3nastykki tvist og bast h\u00e1lfkl\u00e1ru\u00f0 \u00e1fram),\u00a0get ekki haldi\u00f0\u00a0\u00e1fram a\u00f0 vinna\u00a0upp\u00a0heimas\u00ed\u00f0una m\u00edna \u00ed\u00a0aulaheldu heimas\u00ed\u00f0uumhverfi \u00e1 vefnum o.s.fr.\u00a0\u00deetta ver\u00f0ur allt kl\u00e1ra\u00f0 \u00ed fyllingu t\u00edmans \u00feegar betur stendur \u00e1. \u00c9g hef komist a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 “Aldrei fresta \u00fev\u00ed til morguns sem h\u00e6gt er a\u00f0 gera \u00ed dag” er alger steypa og a\u00f0 \u00ed rauninni er i\u00f0jusemi stundum r\u00f3t alls ills …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

vir\u00f0ist ekkert \u00ed r\u00e9num. \u00dev\u00ed mi\u00f0ur. \u00c9g er enn \u00f3l\u00e6s, stoppa\u00f0i \u00ed mi\u00f0ju kafi \u00ed spennandi gl\u00e6pas\u00f6gu og er f\u00f6st \u00ed byrjuninni \u00e1 \u00cdslenskir k\u00f3ngar, b\u00f3k sem m\u00e9r finnst mj\u00f6g skemmtileg. \u00dea\u00f0 er f\u00falt a\u00f0 …<\/span> Read More …<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-525","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-thunglyndid"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/525","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=525"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/525\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":545,"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/525\/revisions\/545"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=525"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=525"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harpahreins.com\/blogg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=525"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}